BlueJays

I looked out my window the other morning into the back yard. There’s a bird feeder back there and I’ll glance out the window to see if there’s any activity at the feeder. On this particular morning I saw a sight I had never seen before, there were 5 bluejays at the feeder. I had never before seen more than 2 or maybe 3 bluejays around the feeder. The sight of 5 bluejays around the feeder was so interesting that I stood there transfixed for many minutes. How do 5 bluejays all come to the same feeder at the same time I wondered. Were they all part of the same family, or maybe it was a gang of bluejays marauding around pillaging every feeder in the neighborhood.

Or maybe, just maybe it happened like this:

The 5 bluejays meet every morning on the power line in the middle of the neighborhood. From there they decide what feeders to hit for breakfast and make plans for their day. There’s 4 older birds named Mort, Stan, Art and Murray (everyone always gets Mort and Murray confused) and there’s 1 younger bird named Kevin who is usually running late and the older birds give him grief, but they look out for him like a younger brother. This morning was no exception.

“Morning Art,”…

“Morning Murray, … where’s everyone?”

“Dunno, just got here, but I’m sure the kid’s runnin late”…… they always call Kevin “the kid,” never Kevin.

Stan and Mort fly in almost simultaneously and the greetings continue.

“What’cha do this weekend ?”….Mort (or maybe it’s Murray, see I told you everyone gets them confused) asked Art.

“Oh, the wife wanted to go flyin around lookin’ at the colors, so we did that all afternoon.” I said, I said why you wanna go flyin around on the weekend, dont’cha do that all week?”

The 3 other birds all nodded in agreement having been there before themselves.

“I jus wanted to stay home and do some things around the nest, ya know get ready for winter, but no we gotta go flyin around”….

Again the other 3 birds nodded along, they all knew Art’s wife and they were glad none of them were married to her.

At this point I should tell you that Art has a very distinctive eastern accent, he was originally from New Jersey but relocated to the mid-west on the recommendation of his doctor who told him the cleaner air and less crowded conditions in the mid-west would be better for his health.

“Where’s the kid ?”….asked Stan, eager to shift the conversation away from Art’s wife.

“Dunno…” said Murray or maybe Mort….one of them also has an east coast accent, not because they lived there but because they’ve hung around with Art so much they just started talking like him….which you would think would make it easier to identify who Mort was and who Murray was but nope, everyone still gets them confused.

“The kid’s always late”…says Art no longer wanting to talk about his wife now that they can rag on “the kid.”

“Ya, the kid’s always late”….said Stan

“Sure is”….

“You can bet on it”….

“Kid’s these days….no respect for being on time or commitments or there elders,”

to this they all nodded in agreement…

“So, I was at the Anderson’s over the weekend”….said Mort

“The Anderson’s, which one is that ?”…replied Stan

“You know, the red house over there”….answered Mort

“That’s not the Anderson’s, that’s the O’Neil’s, the Anderson’s are the blue house”…

“No, youz guys are both wrong” piped in Art relishing the idea of getting in the middle of an argument…

“the Gladwell’s are the red house and the Thompson’s are the blue house”….

“what ?…neither one of those are right and besides your color blind”….retorted Stan also enjoying the argument.

This argument happened at least once a week and carried on for several minutes as they tried to determine who lived in what color house.

“Anyhow, I was at the red house and I saw the cutest little finch, I never saw her before but man you should have seen her tail-feathers”….at this point Mort let out a low whistle, not his usual bird whistle but more of a long appreciative male type whistle.

“Really, did you get her name?” asked Murray….

“Her name?….no I didn’t get her name, I was checking out her tail-feathers, why would I wanna know her name, I’m not dating her”….

“I just thought maybe you got her name, so if you see her again or maybe if I bumped into her then I could say “hi”, I’m a friend of Mort’s”….it was widely known that Murray was always looking for a younger bird to fly off with.

Just then out of nowhere, in a ruffle of feathers, Kevin came flying right into the middle of the group causing each bird to hop over one spot.

“Guys, guys, I got something to tell ya”…he started excitedly

“well, well look whose here”…

“well if it ain’t Mr. on-time”….

“where ya been kid, hanging out with that sparrow you met down south last year”….to this they all chuckled, but they were also a little jealous because that sparrow was really cute and they all wished they were younger and could hang out with her.

“what?…no” replied Kevin….

“guys, guys listen up” he tried again…

“I was over at the red house over there”….

“oh, you mean the Anderson’s,”… all 4 birds said simultaneously

“no, how many times do I have to tell ya, the Anderson’s are the brown house, the Gladwell’s are the red house”….although Kevin was always running late, and he could be a bit forgetful he was the only one who knew where everybody lived.

“guys, listen up, they have the good stuff”….

with this announcement he had the attention of all 4 birds

“whatcha mean, the good stuff ?”

“the good stuff, the nuts and the berries”….replied Kevin

“the good stuff ?…the nuts and the berries ?… you pulling my feathers, kid ?…cuz nobody has the good stuff this late in the year, they only have the nuts and the berries in the spring when they’re trying to lure us to their feeders….you sure about this kid ?”

“I’m sure, and they have two feeders and there both full”….with this information all 4 older birds gave a long, low whistle and began talking excitedly amongst themselves….

“did you hear that ?…2 feeders both full”…

“Ya, I heard…we gotta get going”

“Wait a minute, wait a minute, was there anyone else there ?…were the cardinals there ?”….Mort said this with a sneer for they all hated the cardinals….

“no, there’s nobody else there, just a couple of doves” ….replied Kevin

“doves ?…we knows how to get rid of a couple of doves, don’t we boyz”…..Art chortled …….it was assumed that because Art was from New Jersey that he had friends or family in the bird mafia because he was always talking about “getting rid of birds”

“alright boyz, lets fly, kid you lead the way”…..

And that’s how I ended up with 5 bluejays in my backyard feeder on a Monday morning

As always….be kind, feed the birds and Peace

John